The Catch 22

As an individual living a completely unique life, I often find myself in a never ending cycle of a “Catch 22.” You know the term.

catch 22 – (noun)  a dilemma or difficult circumstance from which there is no escape because of mutually conflicting or dependent conditions; a “catch 22 situation”

That’s me. That’s the world I live in. There are days I walk around mad at the world thinking, “These people! With their ‘problems’ just have no idea what life is really, truly like for our family. If they want a problem, I’ll show them some problems. I wish they would come over here and really get in the grind with me and see for themselves!” Now, clearly, not the best attitude in the world to have. And I pray my way through those nasty days like that. But those days exist. I will not lie.

So here’s the catch. I have had people get in this grind with me. They have seen for themselves. They have come into my home and seen my family during the “witching hour” (which is WAY more than an hour, by the way) as we spend multiple hours a night caring for our son’s routine medical needs. They have come and cleaned my house while I was at the hospital with a sick child. They have heard me on the phone during countless phone calls managing my son’s care. And they try their hardest to understand each and every tiny facet of what this life is like. But they can’t understand it. Not truly.

And so there I am. I want people to try and understand it and when people do try, I often times write it off and think, “Oh, you’ll never understand it!” So what do you do then? Literally, no one gets it.

I was reading in Psalms this morning and I read David’s words to the Lord. In Psalm 25, David says to God, “Turn to me and have mercy on me, for I am alone and in deep distress. My problems go from bad to worse. Oh, save me from them all! Feel my pain and see my trouble. Forgive all my sins.” (Psalm 25:16-18, NLT) That’s when it hit me.

Having a desire for someone to understand my world is not a new concept. David felt the same way. I want someone to truly “get it”, because I oftentimes feel alone in this life. Yes, we should help carry each other’s burdens, but that’s not what I’m talking about in this context. (If I need you to bring my family dinner and scrub my toilets, I will ask – don’t you worry!) I am talking about living a life in which the daily dynamic is atypical from the society around you. That can be isolating. However, making someone understand my family life won’t help me. I need to be crying out to the One who blessed me with this atypical life. He is the only one who can turn to me, can have mercy on me, can save me.

Is there something you need to cry out to Him about? Do you have some problems that go from bad to worse? Do you need someone to feel your pain and see your trouble? Do you need someone to forgive your sins? He is right there. Call out to Him and stop the isolation. He will walk right beside you. He gets it. He gave it to you for a purpose. Lean in to Him and stop carrying a burden too heavy when all the strength in the world you will ever need is standing right beside you. Just turn your face to Him.

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